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WHEN EVEN GOD ASKS QUESTIONS by Tadiya Dasi


This poem came as I was wondering at something my teacher had said in one of his recent lectures…

My teacher said that we shouldn't be afraid to approach the guru with all of our questions. In fact, we should come to the guru and "sit and doubt."  I found this attitude so wonderful and freeing. There is so much space and humility, and room for growth in asking questions. In thinking that you have all the answers if you have read a religious book or follow a certain philosophy is very limiting and, frankly, boring. 

The bhakti tradition of Caitanya has an unique theological position that claims that even God doubts himself and asks questions about the nature love and that was the inspiration behind this poem as well.
When Even God Asks Questions

I take a few deep thoughts and question this discussing philosophy and religion
If the answers we have always remain the same

and in their solidness become 
Books and Opinions and Facts
 and despite all the answers
all the schooling
all the Knowing

each heart, at the bottom, still a big question mark

at the core of living beings this big WHY
that keeps us moving

I wonder: Why are we so in love with the answers
when it is the questions that we secretly love
and run away with?

Even when with answers comes the safety of Sureness
we all long for the adventures that
only a good question can lead us to

In a world with too little questions
and too many answers
we have become boring

Don't you realize:
If you have the same answer to every question
there is neither any questions
nor any answers

Trust this: Reality can be questioned, it has a bend to it
in fact
you can ask the Real
the same question a million times
and everytime, you are given a new answer

the more you ask, the more you will have to wonder at
such is Reality, The Beautiful

it loves a curious heart and holds it close

It is Illusion that struggles in it's own web
so easily weaved
yet so deceitful in its knowingness

Knowledge is a living thing
Reality a person wishing to whisper his secrets
into your ear

so come near, and sit
listen and lean in closer: doubt.

If you think you can capture God
between your ears
hold the Infinite in such a tiny headspace

you will be left sitting alone with your mind

and we all know what a drag that is, most likely
you'll make yourself crazy like that

There is no measuring of the Real
it stretches itself unto Infinity
like the pastures of Vraja and Nanda's herd of cows
in the playground of Consciousness

try to swallow this and you can see the whole universe in the mouth of a child
They say after all, From the mouth of the Babes comes Truth

All this wonder is yours if you look at the Real
with eyes of love and embrace the Truth with your whole being
like a mother

Remember:
A mindful of God is not enough.
Doctrination is not bliss.

The village of God is for the doubters.
The knowing of Love always a puzzle and a paradox.

Bhakti means to be always full of wonder
to always have questions about the nature of Love:
Does he love me?
Does she love me?
never knowing the fullness of love
as the Full keeps on fullfilling

and to be near the Full
is to be permanently empty:
for the joy of giving
is always
so much more than in getting

even God, the Receiver, knows this
and in secret becomes a Giver. Ours is a god of love
who wonders: Am I really the connoisseur of Love?

And what came from this question?
From the Beloved asking questions about the Lover?

Nothing less than a big bang of consciousness.

A golden Moon rising on the horizon
of ignorance. God in search of himself
turns the whole world upside down:

the Moon in the darkness of doubt
in the orbit of love in separation
suddenly outshines the Sun in it's brilliance

those who are looking, will be given the Light to see

In the stories of Consciousness
asking questions
the teachers sing lovesongs to the Divine
and the students run barefoot away from their gurus and parents,
from the schools to the jungles of passionate love

in this play the illumined Preceptor is falling on his knees
in search of  the Dark Fool of Love

such is the radiant power of being a Seeker
instead of a Knower.

The pull of a heart
given into a Question becomes limitless and open:

So doubt and let your questions fill you up
let your search for answers
make your heart soft, quivering and questioning

soon, you'll be running barefoot into the Forest, too
a fool for Love
loving the questions

and If you're still not convinced and want to hang onto
what you know

ask yourself this:

When even God asks questions,
who can claim to have The Answer?



Tadiya dasi is a bhakti yogini who has always loved to write and read. Mostly she has read about religions, both as a student of Religious studies in university as well as a student of the Divine studying the Bhakti-scriptures such as the Bhagavad Gita and the Bhagavata Purana. She writes mostly for her own pleasure, for self-reflection and creativity. Recently, she has begun to give lectures on bhakti yoga. Her favorite place to practice bhakti yoga is in one of her teacher's ashrams, surrounded by beautiful nature and lots of cows. She, though, lives mostly in Helsinki, the capital city of Finland. Her inspiration to write and to share bhakti comes from her teacher Swami Tripurari. You can email Tadiya at tadiyadasi@yahoo.com

~If you are interested in seeing your poetry appear in this blog, or submitting a poem by a woman that has inspired you, please click here for submission guidelines. I greatly look forward to hearing from you!~  

Comments

  1. I like the way this poem explores the danger of certainty, of which, like, Michael Crichton, I'm certain there is too much these days. I particularly like this: " Knowledge is a living thing
    Reality a person wishing to whisper his secrets
    into your ear

    so come near, and sit
    listen and lean in closer: doubt.

    If you think you can capture God
    between your ears
    hold the Infinite in such a tiny headspace

    you will be left sitting alone with your mind"

    And yes, I think many of us know what a drag that can be. Thanks for this, Tadiya.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Like the Swami above, I also like the way you personify knowledge. In this bhakti context in reminds me of the three parts of bhakti as described by Narada in the Bhakti Sutra: 1. The lover, 2. the beloved, and 3. the Love! So, it is almost like the knowledge you personify in this poem is the third component: the Love! And love reveals itself to those who are in awe of how much they are loved, longing to understand it.

    This is the beautiful perspective of Caitanya's sentiments your poem reflects, who descended in an attempt to understand the way Radha loves Krishna, in an admission of his own lack of knowledge about this experience. I love the way you express that here: "...even God, the Receiver, knows this and in secret becomes a Giver. Ours is a god of love who wonders: Am I really the connoisseur of Love?..." Imagine! Even God asks himself if he knows love! And your ending emphasizes this beautifully.

    Thank you for another inspired offering to this poetry community!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you both for your feedback! It took me awhile to realize that there were comments here on this blog! Feedback is food for the poet's soul : Its lovely to hear what words, or lines, different people resonate with. It feels good to be in dialogue with one's readers like that :)

    Krishna Kanta, yes that was what I was getting at when speaking about Knowlegde as a living thing (i.e. how to love Krishna; the love of God). You got it!

    All "my" understanding of Caitanya's sentiments come from my guru, Swami Tripurari. In fact all of "my" good ideas come from him :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Something deep inside is wide awake to this piece.

    ReplyDelete

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