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DISILLUSION by Dana Gornall

So many times I hold on to an idea or an image of what I want…

And occasionally that thing just doesn't happen. Sometimes this is a blessing but sometimes it is just a matter of life being life. We roll the dice and we get what we get. While in my heart I know this, it doesn't make the sting any sweeter.


Disillusion


I want
long summer nights that
stretch on for days and skies full of
falling stars that lead to wishes that
lead
to dreaming with my eyes open.

I want
a warm bed at night that
beckons me into sweet sound slumber
without thoughts from the day
filling
my head full of worries and insecurities.

I want
a pink sun in the morning that
turns the sky a rosy glow and promises
a fine day ahead full of happy
deeds
done with kindness from the heart.

I want
to unwind the hands of time so that I could
once again live in that space
of believing in the things deemed to be
impossible
and are in fact quite plausible.

I want
to forget that nothing goes unchanged
or becomes unhinged at the core
but people and things are actually
constant
reliable and invariable.

I want
those things that come from the places
in my mind when I am at the edge of sleep and wake
or wake and sleep, so much that I sometimes
forget
that’s just
not how
it goes.



Dana Gornall  is the co-founder of The Tattooed Buddha and mom of three crazy kids and a dog. Becoming a mother was the first step on the winding, sometimes rocky, path of transformation and she has never looked back. She has been writing stories since she could put words into sentences, writing books and poems from early on and is still completely in love with language of all kinds. The desire to connect with people on a deeper level has always been the catalyst for writing and still is every single time she sits down at the computer to bleed her heart onto the page.A writer, editor, sign language interpreter and lover of language, she finds bits of enlightenment in all of those connections. When not working or writing, you can find her lying outside in the dark night gazing up at the millions of stars or dancing in the kitchen with her children. You can also see her writing on The Tattooed Buddha, Elephant Journal, Be You Media and Yoga International You can connect with her on Twitter and Facebook.

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(This poem originally appeared in Lynn's debut poetry collection, Back to Grace, found here)



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