We all
wish or attempt to escape life sometimes...
We don’t
want to be seen, or rather, to see our flaws reflected in others in our
interactions with each other. We want to hide what we identify in ourselves as ‘’not
good enough’’ or not “perfect”, or imperfect for that matter.
We all
have a little child we once were. How was she? Shy? Not seen? Not considered as
good enough? Ignored? Not loved? Not supported? Alone in minds of adults? We
all have felt alone in one way or another: each and everyone of us. A happy
childhood does not exist, only happy moments or memories.
This is
basically the main theme of this poem: How, even now as adults, we may still
see that little child in us crying, weeping and hiding, because she still feels
insecure in all kind of relationships. She wants to run away because she does
not know that now she has become an adult who is going to take care of this
small part of her yet alive.
It is
not an easy ‘job’ to be fully responsible for our little child inside and take
complete care of her and give her what she never received as a small kid: love,
attention, play, consideration, care, encouragement, and more. Now, as adults, we
need to go in those scared corners of this child where she hides and take her
from there, securing her that everything is OK now. Only the adult in us can do
that, no one else can do it for you. This child needs you. Support her, give her tenderness and treat her equally as you
do others parts of yourself. She will be happy and more joyful and playful: qualities
she may have never before set free! Only you can do that for her. Don’t let her down.
Why
Do You Run From Me?
by
Ilda Dashi
Why do
i run from my own reflection,
anytime
i face mirrors,
that
give ‘life’ to my death and resurrection?
Why do
i hide behind my anger and fear,
anytime
i face myself in others,
anytime
a broken mirror shows my mangled leather and flesh from near?
Why do
i escape endlessly, losing my real face,
anytime
my fears show up heedlessly,
in
every encounter with the other they draw their horrible trace?
Why do
i drink from the cup of misery,
anytime
i see myself in them,
dragging
my soul on a place that wouldn’t let it be free?
Why do
i punish my little child that wants to grow,
anytime
it follows butterflies in a colorless movie,
where
the images produce an adult show?
Why do
i escape when i see holes inside me,
anytime
the other meets me on the red lines of my insanity
when
the only option is to sit and see?
What’s
inside my wild, soft, childlike pain and agony?
I want
to encounter each face that stares at mine with courage,
because
every eye and lips composes some of my inner life, my reality.
such beautiful inquiry in this piece. i would love to hear the answers to these questions. thank you for sharing this tender stream inside you.
ReplyDeleteDear Lesli thank you for sharing your thoughts on this piece, much appreciated.These are questions we all ask ourselves at some point in our lives and the answers we need to find for ourselves along the journey...each answer to same questions is very different because we are all unique individuals...I hope you have found yours :). Thanks again Ilda
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