It’s a poem about the mistakes I made, the shame
I carried. I was in a complicated relationship and when it became abusive I did
not leave thinking that I can help the other person. I finally left but not
before losing my dignity. I had to get over a divorce, losing both my parents
in a period of fifteen months and reinventing myself.
Fearless
by
Ayala Zarfjian
Our bodies
carry our biographies
she says.
Her voice gentle and soothing
as she instructs us into
a yoga pose.
The walls are green
a mix of
jade and avocado.
Our bodies remember
where we have been
and who we are.
They hold the scars and shame.
I breathe
and remember the collisions
of my soul.
Does my body remember
when I’ve been beaten,
even though my scars have faded.
Does it remember despair and hunger
in my darkest moments.
I was a fearless young girl
that followed her heart.
I have traveled the road
of humiliation and determination,
highs and lows.
My body remembers
the joy of the birth of my children,
holding them for the first time
as my soul lifted.
The sorrow of my parents dying,
the conflicts of religion
and spirituality.
The hopscotch between
two continents
that were once both home to me.
How I felt anxiety and loneliness
until I built a new world.
My soul rises,
it’s always known where I belong
and how I feel.
I always knew,
never needed to search
for my identity.
I am complicated,
a contradiction
a survivor.
I have always followed
my heart.
My words have guided me,
lifted me,
gave me a voice.
I wish to leave the words behind
not half-truths
but honest confessions.
I want to wear my shame
as well as I wear my triumphs.
My love will linger in my
boys hearts and
on my lovers lips.
My love is what defines me.
Ayala
Zarfjian: I write a poetry blog called, A Sun Kissed Life, which you may visit here. As long as I can remember I have loved writing and questioning our
journey in the universe. I am a mother of two boys, one I raised mostly as a
single parent and the other I raised with my current husband. My older son is
an emergency room physician and my younger one is in high school. I am a
jewelry designer and I own a jewelry store. I interact with a lot of different
people on a regular basis and I love to listen to their stories. You may connect with me on Facebook if you wish.
~If you are interested in seeing your poetry appear in this blog, or submitting a poem by a woman that has inspired you, please click here for submission guidelines. I greatly look forward to hearing from you!~
Beautiful words Ayala ~
ReplyDeleteThank you, Grace.
DeleteAyala, yours are the words and the strength of a warrior. You have made such an inspiring journey. Your two boys are a testament to your strength. I applaud you......the most for getting out, and being free.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I appreciate it.
DeleteBeautiful Mom! Love you!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I love you! <3
DeleteYou are always inspirational, Ayala. Within your poetry are currents of deep wisdom from a woman I always find as beautiful, simple, & strong. You have a pure heart that can love beyond measure. Thanks for the poem! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kelvin. I appreciate your love and support.
DeleteThis is exquisite, Ayala. I love the opening line, "Our bodies carry our biographies."
ReplyDeleteThank you, Rudri.xoxo
DeleteBeautiful, courageous testimony of all the we embody as human beings. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI love you and your beautiful heart.
ReplyDelete