MAYBE THERE'S A DEEPER LOVE by Megha Suyal

Hopefully, we will all fall in love in our lives, and hopefully that experience will show us more of who we are, instead of less…

In my own life, there was this one person who gave me immense happiness, and brought a glitter to my eyes with his smile, small talks, jokes and voice. I loved the way he called me up every morning to start his day with my voice: he called me every half hour because he was missing me, reminding me that he loved me time and time again.

I was his secret keeper, his patient listener, his crybaby. He was my guide and even mentor at times. He gave me clarity in my life. It even felt as if he had become my reason to live. I built a dream with him in it, and could not imagine my future without him. Irrespective of the geographic distance between us, I felt him near me. Distance, rather, made our relationship stronger! Or so I thought.

Then, one sad day, he started changing and I didn’t understand why. He was still my priority but I was rarely on his mind anymore. I only asked him for time and yet it seemed that he had suddenly fallen short of that. I was confused as to what I did to deserve his neglect. Even within a crowd I felt so alone. We fought often and I cried all the time. He started avoiding me, insisting that I understand his need for space.

Even though I felt a sinking feeling within me to shout and make myself “understood”, and make him realize that I am human too, I heard my heart ask me: “Is this really the way to gain self-respect? Isn’t there more to love than this?”

Maybe There’s A Deeper Love

by Megha Suyal

Yesterday when I looked at you

I thought I could read your heart,

Today, when I look back through time

I miss the once beautiful start.

Being near you was a relief,

being away: a despair!

Being close was a treat,

Being far? A nightmare!

I felt safe in your presence,

you understood me even when I made no sense.

Your smile was my life’s spark,

your tears made everything dark.

There has never been any condition;

our love has always been beyond restrictions.

Now YOU need to make it all new,

it’s your part which seems to be “due”.

Time is ripping us apart,

I so need a new start!

Slowly my strength is making me weak,

I need you; your love is what I seek.

But is it really you I am seeking?

Suddenly, I hear my heart speaking:

“Maybe love is something more?

Maybe it already exists deep within my own core!"

I now live to open up that door.

Megha Suyal: I am a brand and digital strategist from India. I love long drives and good music, play guitar and love to sing. I have been a sportsperson all my life. Recently writing has accidentally become a way to connect with my self. Since discovering this, I have been writing a lot. I pen my emotions down in under ten minutes and don’t edit it at all. This helps me express my emotions easier: anger, happiness, love, friendship, vulnerability, etc. Every piece of writing that comes out of me is associated with my life: an event, a person or a moment which has helped me learn, evolve and grow as an individual in life. You can connect with me at meghasuyal@gmail.com or visit my blog here. 

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