Journey of the Heart

Savor The Sensations The bitter taste of trauma seasoned by salty tears must be savored in equal measure as hot cocoa slowly sipped wrapped in a warm, soft sweatshirt reminiscent of hugs surrounding by friends in the sangha seasons and sensations come and go when we allow nature to just be not holding on or avoiding gentle embrace. In the darkness of winter peace and solitude can be found amidst the cold as snowflakes gently silently fall look closely and see the glittering diamonds that will be reflected by the morning sun savor the sensations release the grip of fear or grasping allowing heart and mind to breathe it all in and let it go with a deep exhale. Mary McManus  poet, blogger, and yogini left her award winning career as a social worker at the Department of Veterans Affairs in May 2007 to heal her own life. During the dark night of her soul she began to express herself through poetry. Her pen became a divinin...

  This life doesn't make sense and it doesn't come with a manual... I learn through falling hard. Lessons that I thought I learned still swim to the surface of an endless pool.  In this poem, insecurity ripples her familiar state of fear and doubt. There's a convergence of feelings and a disconnect with reality. I learn the most when I'm at my lowest. When I let go of what-will-everyone-think? I find that it doesn't matter, what they think.  Redefining the self in terms of accepting who am, what I stand for and believe in, are all within.  Spiritually, I find I'm intertwined with a greater force and an intricate part of a endless universe. The ripples I see are my own illusions of how I should be or what I've been told to be.  The tapes in my memory are being rewritten and my DNA is being rewired. I am love, compassion, sadness, rage and joy. These are all aspects of me and it'...

I require time and space to digest the teachings of life lessons…  I am a slow processor. For my heart, a period of retreat and introspection is a must before I am able to expose myself in full again and be of genuine service to others. Losses are steps to enlighten our mind and they cannot be avoided, nor can the steps. Life is a journey and so is love. Healing is my process. In the meantime trust is on pause. This poem reflects that pause. Photography by Shantosh I’d Rather Not Let’s have one last of each, One last moonlight walk, One last coffee at our Italian spot, One last laugh at goofy stuff, One last spinach treat, One last silent hug, One last of each and then let’s say good bye Lets part like friends… How do I forget the story? How do I murder the memory? How do I cheat my heart that the truth is a lie? How do I bribe time?  I try each day to forgive myself for still thinking of him And to forgive him for hi...

This is a poem I wrote for the younger version of me... As a teenager, I had a strong feeling that I needed something more than the "normal" daily life with its routines and I was tired of chasing the society's empty goals from the get-go. The daily bread wasn't enough then, and it's still not.  I remember feeling frustrated that even the religion I was taught was offering me just platitudes instead of something real and experimental. Though there are references to Christianity in this poem, I mean no disrespect -- it's just how I experienced the faith then -- and I know that Christianity has a lot to offer to a many thoughtful and kind people. The trouble was that I wasn't really sure what I needed - what would truly make me feel alive -  and therefore I felt alienated and fearful of the prospects of life. The "catcher in the rye" obviously refers to the book ;) Now, I just want to hug the younger me and ...