THAT WOMAN by Nanci Bern

People judge each other. That is just a fact...

It doesn’t happen every day, and often those who judge don’t mean to, but when judgement happens it is cruel and it burns. 

I do not have children, and cat lady jokes aside, I sometimes don’t know which hurts more: not having a child or the responses I receive from others when they find out. Some are wildly verbal and others awkwardly silent, but they both hurt. 

While not everyone wants children, for those of us who did but never had any, there is a hurt within that is rarely allowed to be expressed in safety. So we turn to other forms of creation to sooth our hearts. This poem is such a soothing creation for me. 

That Woman

by Nanci Bern

Not being that woman:

The rush of heart stream swooping over the blood of birth

I have not felt that,

Not being that woman:

My body does not recall the urge of time pushing flesh.

I have not known that.

Not being that woman:

The stretch of mucus that is a chord resonating above sound.

I have not heard that.

Not being that woman:

Who is seen to have fingers always touching even in absence.

I have not been that.

But because I am not that woman:

I became this woman:

Who spreads her legs wide and strong pursing her feet to kiss the ground in nurture.

Who flows rich with reds and blues and the spectrum of all colors which is love. 

I am this woman:

Whose body does recall the urge of light that pushed the stars.

Who becomes that woman at her calling.

I choose to birth creation.

It gives itself to me and I sink into its radical alive.

Photography by Chanel Baran

Nanci Bern: Inspired, amused and sometimes befuddled by the creatures we call ourselves—nature, the arts, the spirit and the mind, cosmic or otherwise—she is ever in awe of the spectrum of life. Born hearing, feeling, seeing and knowing her way toward the energetic and emotional imprint of many realms, Nanci’s first awareness of healing was in the 4^th grade when she put her hands on one of her stuffed animals and said to herself, “If I out my hands on her, I can heal her.” Whether her fingers are tapping out her latest work on the keyboard, or delivering relief through her healing work, teaching the spiritual path, pouring lodge water, eco-art therapy and social justice work; Naci’s goal is to infuse and inspire your spirit with healing, humor and the thoughtfulness of natural inquiry. Visit her healing website here, and blog here. Her essays, non-fiction and poems have been featured in various online journals and her poems have also been composed to, danced to and displayed. Learn more on her literary website The Cenafinla Illuminations. Nancy is a gardening lush who dances, meditates and cajoles with the garden Devas of all the seasons. Loves to play in the snow, laugh, share thoughts, make jewelry and cook up and serve on carious sets of dishes, delicious meals for anyone who is willing to try anything. Warning: don't be ambushed by her humor - it sneaks up on you in the middle of the night.

~If you are interested in seeing your poetry appear in this blog, or submitting a poem by a woman that has inspired you, please click here for submission guidelines. I greatly look forward to hearing from you!